Welcome to Conservative Comedy Friday. We begin this edition with a story from the Oval Office where Mike Pence has just arrived to find Donald Trump whooping and hollering…
“What’s the matter, Mr. President?” the Vice President inquired.
“Nothing at all, Mike. I just finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!” Trump beamed
“How long did it take you?”
“Well, the box said ‘3 to 5 years’ but I did it in a month!”
So, Donald Trump offered his budget plan earlier this week, and he made this bold declaration:
“With our national debt well above $20 trillion, now is the time to reverse the trend of climbing government spending. The President’s federal budget commits to restraint while prioritizing funding to rebuild our national defense and strengthen America’s borders.”
Trump proposed a record $4.75 trillion budget plan, the largest in U.S. history. The plan was filled with unreasonable and unobtainable economic assumptions along with deep spending cuts that will never see the light of day in programs near and dear to the Unibrow Party. Despite his deathbed conversion concerning reduced spending, Trump’s plan projects trillion-dollar deficits for the next four years and does not balance the budget for 15 years.
Republicans and Democrats are already doing a Friends theme song parody to the budget plan — your plan’s a joke, we’re broke, your budget’s DOA — because they’re addicted to spending and the power it allows them to keep. Still, they’re not adverse to recycling the same broken promises about fiscal responsibility and smaller government they’ve used in the past. It is, after all, an election year.
In that spirit, I’m happy to present two classic song parodies by Reason TV’s Remy. The first is a take on Tim McGraw’s I Like It, I Love It where, after years of complaining about Washington’s fiscal irresponsibility, Remy is finally in office and ready to make a change. As you can see, this 2016 promise is identical to the 2020 version.
In 2017, the national debt eclipsed $20 trillion (it’s over $23 trillion at this time and still growing). Still, Trump and his GOP buddies ignored this fact and continued finding new ways to spend money we don’t have on things we don’t need. In this parody of Lady Gaga’s Million Reasons, Remy shows us there are 20 trillion reasons to reign in government spending.
Allow me to address a different topic. I’ve written a lot lately about how Trump and the GOP are working with Democrats to find new ways to spy on us, most recently by trying to force companies like Apple to give Big Brother “backdoor” access to our electronic devices. Clearly, the tyrannical assault on liberty has intensified in the Age of Trump.
In this classic song parody of Drake’s Hotline Bling, Remy weighs in on this battle between liberty-killing government and Apple.
Have a great weekend!
David Leach is the owner of the Strident Conservative.