Welcome to Conservative Comedy Friday – Coronavirus Christmas Edition.
I’m worried that I might be going crazy from the isolation we’ve been living under ever since coronavirus tyranny became the new normal.
In fact, I was talking about this very thing recently with the microwave and toaster while drinking coffee, and we all agreed that things are getting pretty bad.
I didn’t mention anything to the washing machine as she puts a different spin on everything. And I didn’t share my concerns with the refrigerator because he was acting cold and distant as usual.
The vacuum was very unsympathetic and told me to just suck it up, but the ceiling fan was a bit more optimistic and felt it would blow over soon.
The toilet looked a bit flushed when I asked for its opinion so it didn’t say anything, but the bathroom door knob told me to get a grip.
After the front door to my home told me that I looked unhinged, my living room curtains told me to pull myself together!
In the end, the iron calmed me down and told me that everything will be fine because the situation isn’t all that pressing.
Nearly nine months after “14 days to flatten the curve,” coronavirus tyranny has reared its head once again in the form of new mandates and stay-at-home orders just in time for Christmas 2020. And needless to say, this is impacting the holiday season in a very bad way.
How bad? Check out The 12 Days of Quarantine, a Christmas parody by Chris Mann recognizing 2020 as the “trash dumpster year” we’ve come to know.
In his new Comedy Central special, ventriloquist Jeff Dunham is joined by Achmed the Dead Terrorist where Achmed shows a bit of the ol’ holiday spirit by sharing a song he wrote about the crazy times we’re living in entitled Up On the Housetop Ode to COVID. Follow the bouncing bomb in this sing-along as your favorite dead terrorist bids adieu to 2020 AND the pandemic!
So, what does a Coronavirus Christmas look like anyway? Ruth Moore answers that question in this parody done to the tune of It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas done in the style of Perry Como and The Fontane Sisters.
“We’re beginning to plan a COVID Christmas, 2020’s curse. And if the government carries on, then 2021 will be even worse.”
That’s it for the Coronavirus Christmas edition, but for more fun and laughter, be sure to check out the Conservative Comedy archives. Have a great weekend!
David Leach is the owner of the Strident Conservative. He holds people of every political stripe accountable for their failure to uphold conservative values, and he promotes those values instead of political parties.