Obama Gives Terrorism A New Recruitment Tool

uighurterroristsbermudaTerrorists around the world are celebrating the creation of their latest recruitment tool,  courtesy of the Obama administration. Thanks to the help of Barack Hussein, they are no longer dependent on the antiquated methods of the past, and they can look forward to meeting their recruitment goals for the next several years.

“The messiah has really come through for us on this one,” stated one terrorist recruiter. “Operation Bahamas” has done more for increasing our numbers than telling lies about torture at Gitmo ever has.”

Operation Bahamas, aka O.B. – a sly use of Barack’s initials, only backwards – is the name given to the new U.S. policy of transporting terrorists held at the Cuban prison, and relocating them to isolated beach houses on the shores of the Bahamas. And while the policy has had mixed results with our European allies – the Bahamas are a British territory and we didn’t consult them before initiating it – it has had tremendous success in improving our relationships with the Islamic nations bent on America’s destruction.

When asked about the mixed results, Obama stated that, “we’ve been friends with England for hundreds of years, so I don’t think they’re going anywhere.” He went on to add, “Don’t forget, as I stated in my speech to my Muslim brothers in Cairo, I consider it part of my responsibility as President of the United States to fight against negative stereotypes of Islam wherever they appear.”

“I did run on a platform of ‘change’ after all,” he confirmed as he boarded Air Force One with Michelle for this week’s date night.

While the marketing details are still being worked on, the slogan that will be seen on terrorism posters around the Muslim world has been determined:

JOIN al-QAEDA!

GET THE BAHAMAS TODAY AND 72 VIRGINS TOMORROW!

DEATH TO AMERICA!

The Muslim-in-Chief was determined to end the Bush policies against Islamic extremism that he claimed served as a recruitment tool for terrorists around the world, and to improve our image with the nation of Islam.

This is one promise he has definitely kept.

 

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